Consider Your Calling

I remember a while back meditating on a (very short) passage of scripture … 1 Corinthians 1:26 “Consider your calling…”
and it seems that’s all I do.

And lately…it’s had me wondering about the direction of the calling I thought I’d been lead to.
I can’t picture a life outside of ministry…at least not a happy one for me.  Sure…I guess anything can be considered ministry, but seriously – if I have to cashier for the rest of my life…I’ll probably go insane.  I don’t think I can do it for another year…let alone the rest of my life.
But, this ministry I feel called to doesn’t seem to be panning out either.

I’ve tried applying to church programs…interviewed for several jobs where I’d lead youth programs (a job I’ve done before).  And all of those interviews have lead to the same response…the same e-mail.
Then I thought about camp ministry.  Granted I’ve only applied for one job…er…two jobs now…so it’s probably a little premature to think this won’t happen…but given the way other things have gone…I’m really not holding out much hope.

It’s hard not to feel abandoned right now.  Even now…my parents have gone to church..and I’m sitting here alone…
Why didn’t I go to church?  Probably the same reason I haven’t been to church (regularly) in several months…I’ve lost heart.

And then…I got this reminder last night…